Thursday, June 11, 2009

I Got A New Apron

The parents went to Rome for three days. I filled in as "mom" while they were gone. When they came back, they had an apron for me. There was da Vinci's Vitruvian Man on it along with a number of other sketches and some fancy cursive letters scribbling "Rome" all over it. It was tacky. Then the mom showed me hers. It was Botticelli's La Venere. Her head was absent and her exposed breasts rested over the wearer's. The mom said, "I assumed I shouldn't give you this one because, you know, you're American...", and then she made the sort of face that one symbolizes by using this emoticon: :-/ . In my mind, she said, "Even though we've been living in the same house for nearly twelve months, I still think you must be a conservative American." The mom continued, "... but if you'd like to trade...." I interrupted her, "Yes! I'd love to trade!!" So now I have a boobalicious apron.

4 comments:

Regina said...

I LOVE IT!!!! But I'd never wear it, being a conservative American.

Tim said...

I would totally wear that...it'd go great with my LGBTerrific shirt!

Liz² said...

Oh man, I love your apron!

Um, date paste, it was made from dry dates and water, whizwhizzed until it's like a syrup (this is good on fruit, too!)

maple syrup for sugar sensitive people? I don't know... I googled it a bit and kinda got the impression that it's loads better than white sugar, but it's still probably got a high glucose rating. The minerals in it might offset that purified sugar lazer effect.

Kittee Bee Berns said...

So funny! We have friends that brought Dazee underpants from Italy with David's stone penis on them. So funny!

xo
kittee