Tuesday, November 18, 2008

4000 Reasons Why I Hate Glasses

Glasses suck big time. I think that I can name two reasons that they're good: 1. They're more economical and 2. I feel less exposed if I have them on and am not wearing make-up. I actually don't care about the second reason.

  • I can't see anything when it rains. It sucks even more when hiking in the Smokies.
  • They fog up when I walk inside a warm building, retreating from the cold.
  • Sometimes I forget to push them up higher on my nose by grabbing the frame's rim and I push them up right in the middle and feel like a huge dork.
  • Any water-related activity.
  • Reading: I feel like I have to take them off to see properly. For some reason this is annoying.
  • Sometimes if you're at Love Parade and you have perscription sunglasses, you put them on and forget that you've left your real glasses somewhere.
  • No peripheral vision.
  • Smudges that never seem to leave.
  • Kissing someone else that also wears glasses. Major awkwardness!
  • Not knowing where they are when I wake up in the morning. Then I can't see anything and finding them is pretty difficult. I have gotten better at this over the years.

There's bound to be more....

  • Oh, sometimes spastic frenchmen can break them on a Saturday night and you have to wait 'till Monday to get them fixed.
  • And roller coasters!


Regina said...

I like the last one. I like em all. I wear mine for driving and movies and watching my TV from across the room. But they suck when I want to see something close-up, like my computer screen, or something I'm reading while simultaneously watching TV, and I tear them off, and thrust them back on. I'm in denial of really needing them for driving, so I've pretty much memorized all the highways and roads in Tennessee. Heaven forbid I should have to deal with a detour.

Cam said...

After some 50 years of wearing them, I agree wholeheartedly that glasses are a nuisance. However, with only one good eye, I value the fact that I can see, even with the painful side effects.